food is mean

I have a love/hate relationship with food. I love to make it but hate to eat it. Well that’s not exactly true; I love to eat things that my stomach hates. I hate eating things that my stomach loves. I also dont like cooking for just me so when I’m left to fend for myself at meals (which is often because Husband and I work opposite schedules most days), I mostly forget. This is bad and leads to many stomach-aches and complaining to Husband. At this point, he’s pretty tired of me being ridiculous and is no longer sympathetic. I don’t blame him.

Me:My tummy hurts.

Husband:What have you eaten today?

Me:Ummmm…, half a bagel, and a bag of peanut butter M&Ms

Husband:I see your problem.

Me:What problem?

Husband:Are you allowed to eat bagels?


Husband:Are you supposed to drink coffee?

Me:Not really…..

Husband:Have you eaten anything with any nutritional value?

Me:M&Ms are healthy! They have peanut butter. That’s protein!

Husband:How big was the bag of M&Ms?

Me:Not small….but it was hot outside. I had to eat them all or they would melt in the car.

Husband:Your inability to feed yourself is astounding. I really am amazed that you are still alive.

Me:I’m great at surviving. There was that one time where I lived off of raisins and a power bar for a week

Husband:And it took you 3 months to recover.

Me:Whatever. I love peanut butter m&ms. I just want to be normal and eat actual food!

Husband:Coffee, half a bagel, and peanut butter M&Ms are not normal food for anyone.

Me:Nutrition is hard.

Husband:How can someone who spends half of her time in the kitchen be so terrible at feeding herself?

Me:Food is mean.

Now, apparently, Husband has designated food monitors for when he’s not home to make sure I eat the right things. What a guy.

Before I get 50 emails, I should tell you that I am healthy and do eat actual food most of the time. Don’t be concerned, I’m just telling you a story I thought was funny.

Oh, and I made this. And it was fantastic but I tried to accomplish it in 45 minutes. It worked but I didn’t take any pictures. Which is okay since it wasn’t very pretty. But it was tasty! I subbed out the crust for my gluten free one and added some ginger and brown sugar instead of white. You should try this-perfect for summer.



what do you mean, “you don’t have any brisket”?!

Happy Memorial Day, America. The older I get, the more I appreciate our country and those who have sacrificed everything for us. Thank you. This is one of my favorite holidays. I love the patriotism and am humbled that our … Continue reading

…on Friday?

love story, part one

This weekend is a special one for me. Beyond the gratitude for those who have fought to keep our country safe and the backyard BBQs and the extra day to sleep in, two years ago this weekend, Husband asked me to marry him. Even if it’s a little unconventional, our love story is my favorite (obviously) and I never grow tired of telling it. Others might grow tired of listening, but I couldn’t care less.

We met through our jobs when we were both living in California and happened to be playing on the same recreational football team. I was the kicker and he was the holder. (He also played every other position because he’s ridiculous.) After the games, a group of us would go out for coffee or ice cream or whatever. Eventually, without us even noticing, that group became just the two of us. Apparently this is called dating. I started inviting him to hang out with my friends, and he invited me along to do things with his buddies. I thought he was pretty stellar and he felt the same about me (although I didn’t figure this out until months later – he wasn’t very obvious with emotions at the time.)

By the time Christmas came around, we realized that we were actually dating and not just casually. This relationship train was headed for commitment but neither of us could figure out how to unbuckle our seatbelts to get off the dang thing. Not that we wanted to, though.

Still, commitment doesn’t mean marriage so we were still happy in our dating life. Until our time in California was up and we were about to get transferred to parts unknown. We then had that talk about options. You know the one: stay together and hope we get transferred to the same place, stay together and try for long-distance relationship success, break up, or……..get married.

I’m sure a lot of thought, prayer, planning, and consideration went into Husband’s vote because he’s just that kind of guy. I knew from the minute we met that he was the one so there really wasn’t any debate in my mind (there was a lot of praying, though!). Turns out, we both voted marriage.

Even though we needed to beat the paperwork clock, it was really important to both of us to spend some time making sure our parents were on the same page we were. We conveniently scheduled all three sets to come visit, one each weekend for three weekends in a row. Amazingly, everyone was incredibly supportive. Secretly, I think my family was just glad to get me off their hands. Dad looked like the cat that ate the canary when Husband asked him for permission.

We were now down to 3 weeks before the paperwork needed to be done, so I knew a proposal was coming soon. Unless Husband had totally changed his mind. We went ring shopping and went on some great dates. No proposal. I was getting nervous.

We had a great road trip up the coast planned for the long weekend: camping, sight-seeing, hiking, drinking coffee and all of our favorite things. I was having a great time but Friday went by, then Saturday, then Sunday with a ridiculous amount of romantic spots and occasions but with no ring. I had made it a point to bring my cutest clothes and actually wear make-up so that I’d be photo-ready for the big moment. My one requirement for him was to make sure I looked cute when he proposed. But there was no big moment. By Monday, I gave up and wore my comfiest clothes, and didn’t bother with the looking cute. Good thing since Husband made us climb 3 miles straight up. I looked like a crazy person when I got to the top of this cliff – my hair was everywhere and I was covered in dirt and sweat. The view was worth it though.

As we stood looking out over the ocean, Husband told me to stay there while he took some pictures. After a few minutes, I turned around to see what on earth he was doing, just as he came sliding in on one knee with a little blue box in his hand.

Husband: Ireallyloveyouwillyoumarryme?

Me: Really? You’re asking me now? I look terrible! What was my one request?!

Husband: Shut up and marry me.

Me: Okay.

Husband: On Friday.

Me: Okay.

And then I nearly tackled him off that cliff.

fancy pants

Alternatively titled, “the post that never ends.”  It is ridiculously long. I apologize. Taking a cue from my beautiful mother-in-law, I expanded my hostessing skills to an actual dinner party. Putting together an actual event was a new one for … Continue reading